omgosh!woke up late again this morning and missed accounts tut! i hate myself for overslping.HAHAs..sigh,too tired le lar..so many projs..tsktsktsk

as usual,stayed back to discuss fom!and yay! we almost completed.except for the compilation for report and the ppt! and den WOOOOTS! WE ARE DONE WITH FOM PROJ.cos theres still an exam of abt 40%? SIAN
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and also as usual, went to the hospital.only that i suddenly feel that im going to the hospital for the sake of going. it shld be in the case of going to the hospital for the sake of seeing my ahma. i dno. i dislike my cousin. she took leave this week and half of next to look aft my ahma. i just feel that she's taking care and doing so mch things for my ahma just bcos she's dying. like wth. maybe tts just my perception. but hey look, she dint rly visit my ahma like on sundays--going to her hse to have meals---and only when my ahma is seriously ill and going to die den she take leave and look aft her EVERYDAY. it makes me think that shes doing just to show everyone shes filial. and before my ahma was admitted to TTSH, i dint even see her visiting my ahma the other times when my ahma was in SGH. mayb she did but i dint see...but i went almost every other days..even if working oso can aft sch go wat...maybe its bcos she lives in angmokio which gives her convenience to TTSH and den she can accessibly reach TTSH to "look after" my ahma.

my ahma oso got maid wat.y nid to show and look aft her everyday. tch.

maybe its bcos my ahma have almost everyday come to my house aft i moved house. i stayed with her till p4 until i moved house.im so used hving my ahma by my side.

maybe u call that jealousy. but i feel that im so outcasted when im at the hospital. like i just call my ahma " ahma" and den im done with everything. like i dont rly get to talk with her. esp with my tt cousin walking around like shes super busy. so what shes a part time nurse at a clinic.like show nia. and my relatives just seemed to like to crowd around my ahma's bed.urgh, i dont get to see my ahma's face! i hate it. i want to tell my ahma i WILL miss her. i want to tell her to tell everyone to go away and let me be with her for some moments.

thats y i was super angry and upset at the hospital just now. i dislike everyone.meaning my relatives. i guess im just too selfish.
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off to do my CD now.handing it up tmr eh! i nid to do it fast and go slp cos i slept an 4am ytd! >___<